My Life

It’s just bacon, y’all.

File Apr 28, 11 08 33 AM

 

Y’all, I have a Culinary Arts degree from (what was at the time I graduated) the second-best culinary institute in America. And yet, this morning, I burned turkey bacon in the microwave. I hadn’t made it in a while and cooked it for 1 minute a slice when it should have been 30 seconds a slice.

This doesn’t make me a rotten person, a bad mom or incompetent. I made an error in judgement and learned a lesson. I made a mistake that didn’t harm anyone and didn’t set off the smoke alarm.

I didn’t beat myself up, I merely dumped the paper towels and bacon in a plastic bag and threw it out the back door so the smell did not permeate the house (when the hubs comes home he’ll put it in the outside trash can). And B & I had a good laugh about it. I use to be THAT person who literally cried over spilled milk. But I decided to stop that shit in 2015. It’s been hard, but worth it: to not get upset with myself nor my child when accidents happen. I’m happier. He’s happier. Our home is calmer. Eliminating these particular emotional roller coasters from my life have been good for me and those around me.

It’s OK if you burn bacon, too. You’re human and accidents happen. Take a deep breath, throw it out the back door and start again.

Now excuse me, I need to make B some more bacon.

“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

I’m not always my son’s favorite person (and, believe me, he’s not always mine!). However, no matter what kind of day we’ve had – lovefest or batting heads – he still comes and finds me before going to bed at night. Sometimes it’s a strong hug accompanied by, “Good night, Mama, I love you!” Sometimes it’s a silent, very loose, arms encircling without bodies touching, one pat on the back, you’re not my favorite person right now, kinda goodnight. And I’m OK with that.

As family, as friends, as countrymen, as earthlings, we’re NOT going to like everyone, all of the time! We’re going to stumble, make mistakes, hurt feelings and put our feet in our mouths – intentionally or unintentionally. However, when we get angry at, or are hurt/disappointed/let down by someone, we need to remember some things. WE are just as human/fallible/disappointing, at times, as the other person. 
I have learned from experience that Karma is real! For every time, word, circumstance I’ve judged another, I’ve later found myself in a similar circumstance. 
It’s a wonderful gift Jesus gives us: to walk in another’s shoes. So *really* pay attention when you’re there. Emerge yourself in those shoes! Absorb all the feelings you’ll receive and reflect on all the feelings you’ve inflicted on others. 
Then forgive, be forgiven, move on, and do better. 

Because…pants. 

It’s been one of those weeks. We’ve been running hither and yon constantly. We haven’t been home long enough for me to make real meals until today. And when I tried to make breakfast this morning, I realized we had no food! Thank goodness the hubs forgot to take his leftovers from last night’s drive-thru dinner to work. However, the boy chose to go hungry rather than eat the cold, popcorn chicken. So I typed up a grocery list while eating the cold, popcorn chicken and dreaded going to the store.
“Don’t you want REAL food in your house,” you ask. “Don’t you want to be able to nourish your family with wholesome goodness so they have go-power and live long, healthy, prosperous lives?” Yes! Yes, I truly do!
But here’s the thing: it involves putting on pants. I don’t need every hair in place, flawless makeup nor stain-free clothes to leave the house, but I do need pants. And I’ve “panted” enough this week. I panted all over the DC Metro area this week: interacted with strangers while volunteering at a concession stand, having conversations with other basketball parents before, between and after games, matching the loud cheers of the other parents so well that I caused my own hearing aid to squeak and whistle and ensured the uniforms were washed daily so the teenager didn’t leave the house in stinky pants. I’ve even shamefully tried to convince my son to skip at least one, if not all three, of the 4-H activities he has this weekend, by telling him he’ll miss out on playing with his neighborhood friends, so I can stay home. So, TODAY, I need a break from panting. I just. Don’t. Want. To pant today. 
I went upstairs to shower and pant but put it off by visiting the boy in his room, instead. “You know what I’m in the mood for,” he asked. Please say staying home all weekend, I thought. “Pizza!” I didn’t explain to him that we are NOT going to get food out AGAIN, that we are going to the grocery store, because I knew couldn’t be convincing. I left his room and, instead of going into mine to pant up, I wandered back downstairs. 
I saw I had a missed call from the hubs so I called him back, if only to put off the inevitability of panting a little longer. 

 
Me: Sup?

The hubs: Back from grocery shopping?

Me: No. I’ve been busy. Going to get ready now. 

The hubs: Oh, good, I caught you! I’m in the mood for sushi!

Me: Ugh! The boy’s in the mood for pizza, but we need real food in the house!

The hubs: I’ll bring home sushi & pizza and then do the shopping tomorrow while you and the boy are at 4-H. 

And just like that, I got a “buy” (yup, I’m a sports mom, now). A buy that includes sushi. And I’m taking it. Because…pants. 

UPDATE: The boy just walked by with something crinkling in his hand. “What’s that,” I asked. “I found a cheese stick and ate it,” he replied. 

I burst into tears. “I’m sorry we don’t have any food but I just can’t pant today!”

He wrapped me in his arms and patted my back. “You don’t have to pant today, Mom. And it’s OK that we don’t have any food. You know why? Because we have ingredients and we’ll make food.”

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