I earned my coffee this morning!

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I’m not a big coffee drinker. In fact, I just had my first cup less than 2 years ago. But this morning was one of those days I needed a cup of coffee. I have my period, so I’m not just the usual I’ve-been-a-mom-for-12-years-I’m-in-my-40s-I-stay-up-way-too-late-at-night-because-it’s-the-only-time-I-can-be-alone tired, I’m also bloated-can’t-sleep-from-the-pain-irritated-already-don’t-push-my-buttons-finally-fell-asleep-right-before-dawn-then-the-hubs-rudely-woke-me-up-and-I-have-a-ton-to-do tired. Needless to say, I wanted a cuppa.

The hubs likes dark roasted coffee, but it’s too much for me. However, since I rarely drink it, I refuse to buy K-cups for myself. So, we learned this lovely money-saving tip from my ILs last year and have been doing it ever since: we use each K-cup twice. He makes himself a cup of coffee before heading off to work and leaves the K-cup in the machine. Should I want a cup of coffee, or if B’s asthma is flaring up or he is sick, I’ll use that K-cup to make a 2nd cup of coffee and then discard it. If the K-cup is still in the coffee maker the next morning, the hubs knows it’s only been used once, makes himself a cup with that same K-cup and then tosses it. I’m OK if you think that’s gross. However, by the 2nd cup, the grounds are weaker, so it’s not bitter to me and I don’t get heartburn. Plus, I am now paying 50% less than you for K-cups by using them twice. BOOM! Anywho, back to me and my all-that kinda tired from paragraph one…

Make the cuppa, got a spoon and then grabbed the bottle of French Vanilla creamer that the hubs had left next to the coffee maker. It. Was. EMPTY. *deep breath* I’ll just go get another one from the fridge in the garage. The hubs always lets me know when he opens the last bottle of creamer so I’ll get more. He will go into withdrawal if there is no creamer in the house, I tell myself to keep calm. Hunt down house & garage keys and some outdoor shoes (I was wearing my indoor shoes and they cannot be worn outside), unlock the back door, walk through yard to detached garage, unlock garage door walk over to fridge and open it up. NO. CREAMER. *deep breath #2*  Stay calm, stay, calm, I tell myself. We’ll just use some sugar and milk. It’ll be fine! Yes, I talk to myself in the plural sense. It takes a village to keep this lady a calm, productive member of society on the outside.

Lock up the garage, walk through the backyard to the back door, enter the house, lock the back door, take off outdoor shoes, slip indoor shoes back on, walk into kitchen and open fridge. *deep breath #3, this time through clenched teeth* The deep breath didn’t work. I yelled, to no one in particular, “YOU’VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME! THERE’S NO FUCKING MILK IN THE HOUSE?! I WAS JUST IN THE GARAGE AND THERE ARE TWO GALLONS OUT THERE!” I had hoped that tirade happened in my head but, no, the immediate pausing of Phineas & Ferb on the TV and B running into the kitchen confirmed that came out of my mouth. *deep breath of shame #1* B offered to go out and get the milk since he was the one who used it all up and did not replace it, as he should have, but I rewarded him for paying attention to my tirade but sending him back to Phineas & Ferb and went back out to get the milk myself.

Hunt down house & garage keys (I had actually left them in the back door for convenience’s sake, but didn’t remember doing that) and thankfully my outdoor shoes were by the back door as well, unlock the back door, walk through yard to detached garage, unlock garage door walk over to fridge and grab a gallon of milk. Start leaving the garage and then decided to check the expiration date of the milk before going any further. *phew, we’re good* Lock up the garage, walk through the backyard to the back door, enter the house, lock the back door, take off outdoor shoes, slip indoor shoes back on, walk into kitchen and over to my coffee cup. Add 2 spoonfuls of sugar (no judging), some milk, stir and take a sip.

This was the second best cup of coffee I’d had in my life (the first being my very first)! Fresh, smooth, clean, without any chemical aftertaste. *Ahhhhhh*

I have drunk this cup while typing all tis out for y’all. Now I can tackle the things I have to do today that warranted the coffee. Enjoy your weekend!

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